Let's just say S said: "I think you are having fun with your books and your wine."
I love him to pieces.
9.3.07
8.3.07
Happy International Women's Day
What it says in the title.
I'm still studying.
Yesterday we got the dates and panels for the oral portion of our comprehensive exams. I get to go on the first day, which is nice. I admit I was kind of not happy about it all yesterday - but in retrospect a lot of my reaction was the shock of opening an email and seeing my panel and when I have to do everything. I just want to write wonderful essays and be done with it. I'm definitely ready to move on to reading new books rather than rehashing the books I've been obsessing over for the past two years. I suppose that is just how it is. I am bad at waiting.
I'm still studying.
Yesterday we got the dates and panels for the oral portion of our comprehensive exams. I get to go on the first day, which is nice. I admit I was kind of not happy about it all yesterday - but in retrospect a lot of my reaction was the shock of opening an email and seeing my panel and when I have to do everything. I just want to write wonderful essays and be done with it. I'm definitely ready to move on to reading new books rather than rehashing the books I've been obsessing over for the past two years. I suppose that is just how it is. I am bad at waiting.
6.3.07
5 weird things
5 Weird things about me (it was going to be 10, but I need to get back to work soon)
1. When I eat bite size candies, I have to have the same number on each side of my mouth. When I was younger all things also had to be color matched, but now it's just with Skittles.
2. I love reorganizing my bookshelves, and keeping a spreadsheet of my "library." As I look over in that general direction... my hands are itching to reorganize. No! Not yet!
3. When potatoes sprout it makes me want to pull my hair out. I through them out, unless S is around to make the sprouts disappear for me.
4. I am physically incapable of throwing out an aluminum can or plastic bottle. They did a good job on me in Kindergarten about the importance of recycling.
5. I'm pickier than a 5 year old about my food. It's not so bad now that I cook for myself, but there is always a fear that someone is going to serve me food I can't/won't eat. The worst is when someone eats tuna followed by a banana, in my office. I think I would rather starve. And the banana smell really does nauseate me.
Well there are 5 to start with... perhaps later I'll come up with another 5, or I'll just not come back to it.
1. When I eat bite size candies, I have to have the same number on each side of my mouth. When I was younger all things also had to be color matched, but now it's just with Skittles.
2. I love reorganizing my bookshelves, and keeping a spreadsheet of my "library." As I look over in that general direction... my hands are itching to reorganize. No! Not yet!
3. When potatoes sprout it makes me want to pull my hair out. I through them out, unless S is around to make the sprouts disappear for me.
4. I am physically incapable of throwing out an aluminum can or plastic bottle. They did a good job on me in Kindergarten about the importance of recycling.
5. I'm pickier than a 5 year old about my food. It's not so bad now that I cook for myself, but there is always a fear that someone is going to serve me food I can't/won't eat. The worst is when someone eats tuna followed by a banana, in my office. I think I would rather starve. And the banana smell really does nauseate me.
Well there are 5 to start with... perhaps later I'll come up with another 5, or I'll just not come back to it.
3.3.07
At least I'm not dreaming about it
Oddly enough, and despite my minor freak-out last night, I was really productive today. And I haven't freaked out at all.
Last night, when S and I got off the phone I wasn't sleepy, so I was doing some more reading in giant Cambridge History of X Literature, when I found myself distracted at the thought of how my oral exams are going to be. Now, I definitely have professors that I would really like to have on my panel, and some that I would rather not have. I have no say in the matter - it is entirely up to scheduling coincidence. So instead of imagining how people might be on my committee, I was thinking about who would come to watch my oral defense - I know a few of my friends want to come to support me, which is so sweet of them. But then I was thinking of the whole process - once you finish, you and the observers leave and wait outside while the professors inside confer, and then they call the test taker back in to tell you your results. I was imagining how I might react if I don't pass everything. I mean, I should, but still. I don't want to cry in front of people! But I am horrible at not crying when I want to cry. So I had a minor freak out and I admit, tears were shed. At that point I decided that reading about poetic movements of the 20th century wasn't doing it for me and turned off the light to listen to the BBC. To my knowledge, I didn't have any dreams about the exams... at least, not any that I remember.
So this morning, I dragged myself out of bed (Aside: why, o why, does the NPR station I have on my bedroom radio have such a weird Saturday morning schedule? The station I have the radio tuned to in the living room has Weekend Edition, Car Talk, Whaddya Know, and Classical Music. The one in my room has Weekend Edition really early in the morning, that is, before I wake up, then a rebroadcast of the Diane Rehm (Sp?) show, which I can't stand, followed by This American Life, which I also tend not to like. Ugh. But they have the BBC at night! Their saving grace... maybe I should just get up earlier on the weekends.) and did work. I made it all the way though the Cambridge History, I cleaned the apartment (tile floors included, as well as breaking out the pink spring tablecloth!), and I now feel 1000% better about the time period I am most worried about. It's amazing what one day's concerted studying can do.
I'm hoping for big things tomorrow, as well. I'm off to church in the morning - I hope - even though bad weather has kept me home the last few weeks. I've also decided that, even though I can't properly do anything Lenten until this horrible horrible experience of exams is over, I am going to try to go to the Wednesday noon organ recitals and evening service with meal, as a way to clear my mind and focus my energy. We will see if I follow through on that... I find myself WANTING to do things at church, but the timing is off, or I have to walk a bit too far (it is a good 25-30 minute walk from my house). But I need something to get me out of the house and away from worrying or obsessively reviewing, useful though those other activities can be. That is what all of the other days of the week are for.
Last night, when S and I got off the phone I wasn't sleepy, so I was doing some more reading in giant Cambridge History of X Literature, when I found myself distracted at the thought of how my oral exams are going to be. Now, I definitely have professors that I would really like to have on my panel, and some that I would rather not have. I have no say in the matter - it is entirely up to scheduling coincidence. So instead of imagining how people might be on my committee, I was thinking about who would come to watch my oral defense - I know a few of my friends want to come to support me, which is so sweet of them. But then I was thinking of the whole process - once you finish, you and the observers leave and wait outside while the professors inside confer, and then they call the test taker back in to tell you your results. I was imagining how I might react if I don't pass everything. I mean, I should, but still. I don't want to cry in front of people! But I am horrible at not crying when I want to cry. So I had a minor freak out and I admit, tears were shed. At that point I decided that reading about poetic movements of the 20th century wasn't doing it for me and turned off the light to listen to the BBC. To my knowledge, I didn't have any dreams about the exams... at least, not any that I remember.
So this morning, I dragged myself out of bed (Aside: why, o why, does the NPR station I have on my bedroom radio have such a weird Saturday morning schedule? The station I have the radio tuned to in the living room has Weekend Edition, Car Talk, Whaddya Know, and Classical Music. The one in my room has Weekend Edition really early in the morning, that is, before I wake up, then a rebroadcast of the Diane Rehm (Sp?) show, which I can't stand, followed by This American Life, which I also tend not to like. Ugh. But they have the BBC at night! Their saving grace... maybe I should just get up earlier on the weekends.) and did work. I made it all the way though the Cambridge History, I cleaned the apartment (tile floors included, as well as breaking out the pink spring tablecloth!), and I now feel 1000% better about the time period I am most worried about. It's amazing what one day's concerted studying can do.
I'm hoping for big things tomorrow, as well. I'm off to church in the morning - I hope - even though bad weather has kept me home the last few weeks. I've also decided that, even though I can't properly do anything Lenten until this horrible horrible experience of exams is over, I am going to try to go to the Wednesday noon organ recitals and evening service with meal, as a way to clear my mind and focus my energy. We will see if I follow through on that... I find myself WANTING to do things at church, but the timing is off, or I have to walk a bit too far (it is a good 25-30 minute walk from my house). But I need something to get me out of the house and away from worrying or obsessively reviewing, useful though those other activities can be. That is what all of the other days of the week are for.
1.3.07
mammoth
Wow that was a long review session. Useful, but mammoth in ... ok I don't know how long a mammoth was, but I imagine they were long as well as large. Right?
Crunch time is on. Exams in 10 days. I can do it, right?
In happier news, I bought my ticket to go to Chile in May today. It was the least expensive ticket to Santiago that I have ever purchased. That was actually quite pleasant. I am so excited to go - I get to see my husband in a little over 2 months! That's really not that long, is it?
Crunch time is on. Exams in 10 days. I can do it, right?
In happier news, I bought my ticket to go to Chile in May today. It was the least expensive ticket to Santiago that I have ever purchased. That was actually quite pleasant. I am so excited to go - I get to see my husband in a little over 2 months! That's really not that long, is it?
27.2.07
yay for interactive discussions
Yet again, I must just say, wow. I'm exhausted, but I'm very happy.
I've been spending every moment that I haven't been sleeping, showering, or teaching since Sunday working on a presentation that I gave today with a classmate. We were very, very nervous. But it went wonderfully, and I am really pleased with the interaction we had with the rest of the class, and the professor's response. It is sort of amusing, because I feel like I transferred all the stress I have been feeling about my exams to this presentation. I was even up late last night putting the finishing touches on my outline! We were supposed to present for an hour between the two of us, yet we managed to keep going through themes and discussing things for the entire 2.5 hour class, and we still have a lot of themes to talk about next class, which, unfortunately, I'll miss because I will be... wait for it... taking one of my exams. I'd much rather be present for the discussion of this particular novel, which is so very, very interesting.
S told me that I shouldn't do any more studying tonight. I sort of want to, which makes me a big dork. But I also have the pile of compositions that have been sitting on my floor since they were turned in... 2 weeks ago. I need to hand them back before Spring Break. Really. So I'd better get to it.
I've been spending every moment that I haven't been sleeping, showering, or teaching since Sunday working on a presentation that I gave today with a classmate. We were very, very nervous. But it went wonderfully, and I am really pleased with the interaction we had with the rest of the class, and the professor's response. It is sort of amusing, because I feel like I transferred all the stress I have been feeling about my exams to this presentation. I was even up late last night putting the finishing touches on my outline! We were supposed to present for an hour between the two of us, yet we managed to keep going through themes and discussing things for the entire 2.5 hour class, and we still have a lot of themes to talk about next class, which, unfortunately, I'll miss because I will be... wait for it... taking one of my exams. I'd much rather be present for the discussion of this particular novel, which is so very, very interesting.
S told me that I shouldn't do any more studying tonight. I sort of want to, which makes me a big dork. But I also have the pile of compositions that have been sitting on my floor since they were turned in... 2 weeks ago. I need to hand them back before Spring Break. Really. So I'd better get to it.
24.2.07
Gustavo Cerati! At the Festival de Viña!
Wow, let me just tell you all I didn't stay up late studying, oh no. I was up late watching the Festival de Viña (which you can watch live on Canal13's webcast). I'll be honest that I usually don't pay too much attention to the Festival - I don't care who is "queen," or the stupid things the hosts say. All I remember from watching bits and pieces last year was Franz Ferdinand and Ruperto. But last night was just great. I admit the line-up was sort of odd: Gustavo Cerati, Ana Torroja, and Kudai. For those not as in love with Soda Stereo as I am, Gustavo Cerati was the main songwriter and singer of the band. So obviously, I was looking forward to that. And he was awesome. It made me forget about studying for a bit! He only played 3 songs from Soda, but he was great, period. You can watch clips from his performance here. It also made me happy to see the public, most of whom were pre-adolescents there to see Kudai, awarded him with 2 antorchas and a gaviota. So basically it was all super cool. I would totally go see him in concert. And there aren't a lot of people/bands I would say that about. So yeah. Wow. :-D
23.2.07
I fear no more. I wish...
S appears to have broken his toe. One of his little toes, to be precise. He appears to have kicked the door frame. I'll admit I'm not quite sure how that happened, but I think he was imitating a comedian from TV. He hurts. That's not fun. But the good news is that this morning, it didn't hurt as much as last night. That is very good news.
A friend and I tried the polenta recipe that was in the Times last week (or was it the week before?) There were moments of doubt as to the success of our meal as the polenta was cooking, but in the end it turned out quite nicely. Very enjoyable. Though it's very heavy. But it was delicious, yes it was.
At our review session yesterday, the professor made a joke about the person in sackcloth and wearing ashes would have been more appropriate to the Wednesday. I chuckled. I'm suck a dork. But in that Lenten spirit, here's a poem (that is also a hymn text) by one of my favorite poets in the English language, John Donne.
A Hymn to God the Father
Wilt Thou forgive that sin where I begun,
Which was my sin, though it were done before?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin through which I run,
And do run still, though still I do deplore?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done;
For I have more.
Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I have won
Others to sin, and made my sins their door?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I did shun
A year or two, but wallow'd in a score?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done;
For I have more.
I have a sin of fear, that when I've spun
My last thread, I shall perish on the shore;
But swear by Thyself that at my death Thy Son
Shall shine as He shines now and heretofore:
And having done that, Thou hast done;
I fear no more.
A friend and I tried the polenta recipe that was in the Times last week (or was it the week before?) There were moments of doubt as to the success of our meal as the polenta was cooking, but in the end it turned out quite nicely. Very enjoyable. Though it's very heavy. But it was delicious, yes it was.
At our review session yesterday, the professor made a joke about the person in sackcloth and wearing ashes would have been more appropriate to the Wednesday. I chuckled. I'm suck a dork. But in that Lenten spirit, here's a poem (that is also a hymn text) by one of my favorite poets in the English language, John Donne.
A Hymn to God the Father
Wilt Thou forgive that sin where I begun,
Which was my sin, though it were done before?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin through which I run,
And do run still, though still I do deplore?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done;
For I have more.
Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I have won
Others to sin, and made my sins their door?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I did shun
A year or two, but wallow'd in a score?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done;
For I have more.
I have a sin of fear, that when I've spun
My last thread, I shall perish on the shore;
But swear by Thyself that at my death Thy Son
Shall shine as He shines now and heretofore:
And having done that, Thou hast done;
I fear no more.
20.2.07
What a wretched incident
So here I am, worrying that S isn't home from work yet. My mother tells me that I shouldn't worry, because it doesn't help at all. But I still do.
We started having group reviews with professors today. I found it quite useful, though it was in my specific adored time period so that might have something to do with it. Among other digressions, the prof said that "You can never say no until you have tenure." Thoughts? I might have more of those once I finish the exams. I will be so happy when I finish them... even though when I got home (late) from the review, I said to myself, OK no more work tonight because you have been working all day and I spoke on the phone with my mother for hours (literally), I feel guilty about not studying. Though most of the conversation was me telling Mom about my studying... which, as she said, is like I'm still reviewing. But still.
On the freak out side of things, last night I was sitting here in front of my computer, thinking about going to bed and chatting with the husband when I heard a giant whooshing sound followed by what sounded like a waterfall. In my PJs I jumped out of my chair and looked at my kitchen (nothing) and then went to the bathroom to find that a waterfall had sprouted itself from the ceiling. So, I throw on some flip flops and run up the stairs to ask the guy who lives above me what is going on. He answers somewhat harriedly and tells me that they already called maintenance and that the bathroom is flooded. Later the maintenance guy comes and checks out my bathroom and tells me that it was the toilet of this guy that was having problems. Let me just tell you, the water that collected in the bucket I put under the waterfall is FOUL. It's yellow. And the smell makes me want to wretch. Basically, I can't use my bathroom without holding my breath. As soon as I get rubber or plastic or whatever kind of gloves tomorrow I'm bleaching it all. And I'm considering throwing out the rug, because it is just disgusting. Disgusting. The maintenance guy came back today but left a note saying the ceiling isn't dry yet (maybe that's the smell and not the water?) and that they wouldn't be able to fix the ceiling until Friday or Monday. EW EW EW. I really just want that problem to disappear.
And to steal an amusing anecdote from my sister: it was 5 degrees, and people were wearing flip flops. And not like me, because they grabbed the first thing they could find, either. That's just darn amusing.
We started having group reviews with professors today. I found it quite useful, though it was in my specific adored time period so that might have something to do with it. Among other digressions, the prof said that "You can never say no until you have tenure." Thoughts? I might have more of those once I finish the exams. I will be so happy when I finish them... even though when I got home (late) from the review, I said to myself, OK no more work tonight because you have been working all day and I spoke on the phone with my mother for hours (literally), I feel guilty about not studying. Though most of the conversation was me telling Mom about my studying... which, as she said, is like I'm still reviewing. But still.
On the freak out side of things, last night I was sitting here in front of my computer, thinking about going to bed and chatting with the husband when I heard a giant whooshing sound followed by what sounded like a waterfall. In my PJs I jumped out of my chair and looked at my kitchen (nothing) and then went to the bathroom to find that a waterfall had sprouted itself from the ceiling. So, I throw on some flip flops and run up the stairs to ask the guy who lives above me what is going on. He answers somewhat harriedly and tells me that they already called maintenance and that the bathroom is flooded. Later the maintenance guy comes and checks out my bathroom and tells me that it was the toilet of this guy that was having problems. Let me just tell you, the water that collected in the bucket I put under the waterfall is FOUL. It's yellow. And the smell makes me want to wretch. Basically, I can't use my bathroom without holding my breath. As soon as I get rubber or plastic or whatever kind of gloves tomorrow I'm bleaching it all. And I'm considering throwing out the rug, because it is just disgusting. Disgusting. The maintenance guy came back today but left a note saying the ceiling isn't dry yet (maybe that's the smell and not the water?) and that they wouldn't be able to fix the ceiling until Friday or Monday. EW EW EW. I really just want that problem to disappear.
And to steal an amusing anecdote from my sister: it was 5 degrees, and people were wearing flip flops. And not like me, because they grabbed the first thing they could find, either. That's just darn amusing.
17.2.07
oh, the things I'll do
Wow it's still cold. I'm not a fan of it. In other weather news (and my father will be shocked by this one): it rained in Santiago in February. Let me remind my readers that the average rainfall for February (and December, and January) is 0. None. The weather is so weird.
I had a meeting with an advisor yesterday for my thesis. It was a really good meeting, though I have decided I am a much better academic writer in English - which makes sense, because it is my native language. But this thesis is not in English, so I have a bunch of polishing to do. Which will happen after I finish my exams, thank you very much. Just like I'm going to look up the etymology of the term flaite, and re-read all the Harry Potter books. Among other fun things.
Speaking of fun, I went to a coffee date this morning with women who are also alumns of my sorority. Unfortunately, no alumns in my age range were there (sad panda!) but they were very nice women and one of them, the local chapter advisor, took me by the house afterwards so I could see it and meet some of the collegians. It's so weird to refer to collegians... but I guess that is because I was one, up until 2 years ago. The concept of a house is also odd to me. But I think I'll go to Founder's Day in March (yay for lunch) and maybe get my feet wet with some small advising responsibility. I am actually super excited about it - I would much rather concentrate on that than the book I'm working on for class, which, though fascinating and well written, is taking me a long time to get through. It's dense. And I get to present on it! (well, not just me, I'm doing it with a friend). So I should get back to that book... maybe I can read a few pages before calling Mr. Hubby at work... the dear has a cold and is cold, but he loves me all the same. :-) And, well, I love him too. Imagine that! Oh, that reminds me of my candle pass when we got engaged...
I had a meeting with an advisor yesterday for my thesis. It was a really good meeting, though I have decided I am a much better academic writer in English - which makes sense, because it is my native language. But this thesis is not in English, so I have a bunch of polishing to do. Which will happen after I finish my exams, thank you very much. Just like I'm going to look up the etymology of the term flaite, and re-read all the Harry Potter books. Among other fun things.Speaking of fun, I went to a coffee date this morning with women who are also alumns of my sorority. Unfortunately, no alumns in my age range were there (sad panda!) but they were very nice women and one of them, the local chapter advisor, took me by the house afterwards so I could see it and meet some of the collegians. It's so weird to refer to collegians... but I guess that is because I was one, up until 2 years ago. The concept of a house is also odd to me. But I think I'll go to Founder's Day in March (yay for lunch) and maybe get my feet wet with some small advising responsibility. I am actually super excited about it - I would much rather concentrate on that than the book I'm working on for class, which, though fascinating and well written, is taking me a long time to get through. It's dense. And I get to present on it! (well, not just me, I'm doing it with a friend). So I should get back to that book... maybe I can read a few pages before calling Mr. Hubby at work... the dear has a cold and is cold, but he loves me all the same. :-) And, well, I love him too. Imagine that! Oh, that reminds me of my candle pass when we got engaged...
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