Dear readers!

Hello dear readers!

I know few people read this anymore (sad!) but I just keep on going.

Today was an interesting day. I felt alert and prepared until I got to class to teach, when I just felt prepared. I have no idea where the alertness went. But it's OK, because class went well.

I'm a little annoyed with Canal 13. They are showing the Under 23 Chile Peru game rather than my teleserie! Not cool!

Music makes me happy

Today was a gray day, but for me a happy day. Why, one might ask? It is really quite simple. I got to play organ! It was great. Really fantastic.

Well let me modify that. My playing wasn't as fantastic as I might have liked - my keyboard skills are still up to snuff (duh!) but my feet... well let's just say my legs are having a harder time remembering what an octave interval is than my fingers have with anything on the organ. I started out working on some pieces I used to be able to play almost in my sleep from the Orgelbuchlein, and they actually caused me a bit of trouble. I just need to focus on the pedalwork and getting the parts back together. I also worked on a Bach Fugue, which went a little better, and I actually was pretty good for the modern piece I gave at a recital over a year ago. The only frustrating thing about that piece is that I didn't have all of the memories to make the register changes. But I was doing the swell pedal without even thinking about it! My hymns are also a bit off - but I find that every time I return to a hymn I haven't played in awhile, I remember how it is supposed to sound - or how I like to sing it - and my coordination between keyboard and pedal doesn't always keep up. But that is just practice. Which is what I can now do! Yippee!!

My mom always says that music is cheaper than therapy. While I definitely subscribe to this, I had forgotten how much I love playing. I have a keyboard in my house and all, but it's not the same as an actual piano (as soon as I have space and money, well you can guess...) Besides which, I don't have the pedal connectors and a few octaves are missing. And the touch is weird. But anyways, while I was playing today I could forget about all of the little things that were bothering me or stressing me and focus on my music. I wanted to skip around after I left the church. Unfortunately my happiness and de-stressing from playing didn't last forever (some people are jerks and don't know how to wait in line...), but now even just thinking of it makes me smile. I have made myself a practice schedule and a list of the pieces I would like to concentrate on - I am so happy! Yay for music!

All kinds of awesome!

So do you, dear reader, want to know what is all kinds of awesome? Of course you do! And tonight's answer is Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Yes, it is that fabulous. I pretended to read Facundo while I watched it. Let me tell you, Indy's growing positive relationship with his father is a gazillion times more interesting. Besides which, watching him punch the Nazis is always fun.

Also fabulous? Church is fabulous. Seriously, it is.

And now that I have made myself sound like a... well... pick your stereotype, I really am going to read Facundo. Really.

I saw a new movie today!

I think I am going to make a rule that I am not allowed to look at the news more than X number of times a day. Because it is getting ridiculous.

I saw El Aura today. It is the last film Fabian Bielinsky made, and I'll admit I like Nueve Reinas much better. El Aura was just, well, somewhat predictable and very (unnecessarily) slow. However, in the long periods when nothing was happening, it was fun to make jokes about. So in that aspect it is positive. But in general, how can I put this? It's a film that buffs will like. In technical terms, it was quite well done, I liked the camera work and the music quite a bit. I suppose it was the plot, more than any other aspect of the movie, that made me feel a bit let down. And no matter how good the camera work is, I do like most of my movies to have a good plot - and it is not a good plot if, having never seen the film and not remembering the trailer, I can predict with accuracy what is going to happen. So, if you want an intersting film to see with people with a sense of humor, watch it, but if you are only going to watch one Bielinsky film, go with Nueve Reinas.

De La Maza

Yes, yes, this is my third post in a single day. But I have lots to say.

Has anyone in the US ever heard of Francisco De La Maza? Probably not. He's the mayor of one of the comunas of Santiago, Las Condes. While Joaquin Lavin, previously my most disliked Chilean politician, appears to have mellowed a bit, De La Maza just makes me angry. (Incidentally, Lavin was mayor of Las Condes, too.) The first thing De La Maza wanted to do was to close off the streets in one neighborhood during the night, supposedly to fight prostitution. Problem? That it is entirely illegal to block roads and sidewalks. His proposal is in the courts right now. But to look at that issue seriously, what would closing off one area do? It would annoy a lot of people who have legitimate business in the area (the neighborhood has a lot of hotels, restaurants, stores), for one. It would also just push the prostitutes to adjacent areas, which in no way actually solves the problem.

I thought that idea was silly, but for me at least, it gets better. The FDA finally approved Plan B for over the counter sale in the US. Oddly enough, Chile is having a Plan B controversy. I think most of the opposition stems from the false belief that Plan B causes abortion (and if you want citations on that, let me know and I'll get them to you.) The government has mandated that public health clinics must distribute Plan B to women over the age of 14 who ask for it, and that those between the ages of 14 and 18 do not need parental consent. Part of the purpose of this push is to allow poorer women access to the same reproductive health options as wealthy women. I think it is a good idea to make the medication available, especially considering the high numbers of (young!) teenage pregnancy. A lot of politicians (UDI, RN, and the Christian Democrats) are against Plan B because they don't really understand it. They aren't against condoms (finally)... Ugh. So, what is De La Maza's take on all of this? He is quoted in the paper as calling Plan B (in Chile, Postinor-2) abortive and saying that even though the law says that it must be made available to those who ask for it, *he* will only give it to minors who come with their parents. Is he a pharmacist? NO. Is this really any of his business? NO. What is interesting about the controversy, however, is how those who are against reproductive choice are couching their position in terms of personal privacy. "The State shouldn't get involved in this!" The State isn't mandating any particular behavior that would lead to having to use Plan B. It is trying to have more equality in health care! Ugh.

Space-cadet update

I admit that my last post was a bit - um... well... I do admit that I still think humanity is inherently good. And people are going to suck, no matter what. As my friend said (and this is a major paraphrase), the world doesn't need more cynics.

That said, my allergy medicine is sort of working. Except my eyes are dry, I'm still stuffy (though not as bad), and I have a killer headache. I'm hoping these pass, too. However, I feel like a serious space-cadet. No matter how hard I try I find it difficult to concentrate on anything. Uf.

But yeah, people are mostly good. Right?

Humanity is really just a big disappointment

Perhaps my title is a bit of an exaggeration - but there are definitely examples that confirm my great disappointment in humanity's apparent lack of an inherently good nature. Maybe we really are all horrible people pretending not to be.

In other words, I am having a horrible, miserable day.

In fact, there are many things that have gone wrong today, from people blaming me for things I had nothing to do with, being almost unable to breathe due to allergies (STILL), trying to get medicine to make it so I can breathe only to be told that THEY DONT HAVE IT (and be attended by the spaciest, most uncapable person ever) except for at three times the price. Please, forget that we had a meeting. And even better, be a horrible horrible person who, when no one else is polite enough to get up and give you their seat, be horrible to the sick person with grocery bags. Yes, without saying a word, pick up her bag and drop it on her foot. And to make things even better, when you are getting off (a whole 1 minute ride later), tap her shoulder to tell her she should "be more considerate of the people around her." Yes, because she can't breathe from allergies and her foot hurts from where you dropped her groceries on her, she must be a horrible person. UGH. If I had said anything nearly as rude to her, everyone would say "you are being mean to the pregnant woman!" [Yes this woman was pregnant. So - why did no one else give her a seat? Why does all of the burden fall on me? Because people suck.] But she can say whatever she likes to whomever she likes, basically be a bad person and fall back on the "I'm weak! Waa!" excuse for her bad behavior. I'll admit it, I'm angry.

I know I shouldn't let these things bother me. Taken alone they would be annoying but not make me furious material. I can't honestly remember a time when I have been so angry in the past few years. Sad, yes, but so I-want-to-throw-something-scream-pull-my-hair-our angry, well, no.

All of this, before noon.

Let's see how much worse today can get.

Allergies descend

*cough* *cough* I am having yet another bout of allergies, which does not make me a happy person. In order to breathe, I need to take medicines that make me feel like my brain is fuzzy. I don't like feeling like my brain is fuzzy. I do, however, appreciate Dimetapp. There is no reason that adults should have to take nasty cough syrup when Dimetapp proves that it doesn't have to make you gag.

My teleserie is most definitely ending in the next few days. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it, because it is very different from most of the other teleseries I have followed. Make that all of them. While it is interesting to see how the writers are resolving all of the different conflicts, part of me wishes that Descarado had been more popular, because it really raises some interesting issues. Medical ethics, business management issues, the normal love-jealousy-betrayal, etc. In the last few weeks, there has been a serious questioning by the "originals" as to why they even agreed to hand their lives over to the secret organization in the first place - which then leads to interesting and diverse reflections as to desire and fulfillment. I'll reserve my final judgment on the teleseries' "message" on that until I see what happens with the original Amanda (whose agent fell in love with the man she was supposed to marry, and tried to have Amanda killed so agent could in fact marry man, though other agent saves her and falls in love, becoming more human in the process). Will they make her go back to "her" life? If that is the case, when Amanda has decided that she no longer loves the man and doesn't want anything to do with it, what truly is the most ethical path? We shall see.

The purpose of libraries

Yesterday I was reminded why I never studied in the library as an undergraduate. I had to read a book that was on reserve in the undergrad library here, and man, it was difficult to concentrate. Evidentally people don't really study there, rather they speak so loudly to eachother that you can't help but here about their lives - how they will wait until the last minute to do their bio homework, students of the language I teach (though thankfully not mine) complaining about the program in general and how much they hate foreign language, break-ups, fraternity fantasy football leagues... in a library? Ugh. It was miserable.

While I know some of my friends thought of the library as a social hub, I imagined it as people sitting at the same table with their laptops IMing the person across from them. Libraries, in my mind, are for quiet study, book collection, and occasionally, computer work or coffee purchases. None of this noisy social hub that makes me want to pull my hair out. Perhaps this is more a symptom of my own study habits than anything else - I hate studying outside my house, where I control everything - food, music, temperature, etc. Either way, I plan to continue my avoidance of the other library. Because it smells funny, too.

On a different note, something hates my sinuses. Or is it that my sinuses hate something in the air here? It makes it hard to concentrate on anything when I feel lethargic and unable to breathe. Hopefully it will pass.

Happy Labor Day. Which I spent, technically, laboring. Woot.

More Poetry! Solzhenitsyn!

And here I have more poetry for you all... I rarely read the poetry or fiction in the New Yorker (is that a bad thing? I tend to stick to the articles, though S likes the fiction) but I actually read this one and liked it quite a bit. I remember looking through my parents books when I was smaller and besides seeing lots of books in a script I couldn't read (and still haven't learned... no Cyrillic for me...) I saw lots of books with Russian authors. I remember reading "One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich" and being shocked yet moved. So here is a poem he wrote, translated from the Russian by his son Ignat, that appeared in the New Yorker a few weeks ago.

Prisoner's Right
Yoke of years that we lived in prison
Grants no rights: we're entitled to naught.
Not to pulpits. Nor lecturns. Nor glory.
Nor power. Nor halos of saints.
Nor in memoirs to mix with fatigue and
Our colorless ashen complaints,
Nor that armies of youths should now run astride life
by the path that we treaded for them.
All will go as 'twill go. There's no point
To pound the wheel's rut in advance.
An illuminated interior suffering core:
May, for everything, this be our one recompense.
It's the loftiest gem of all earthly gemstones,
And, to carry it home undefiled,
Let, of our phantom rights, then, at the very least be
Our secreted right to an equal revenge.
There's a number. So endlessly long.
Comprehensible just to Chinese and to Russians.
All those fallen, extinguished, without guilt or trace.
In that number we're nil upon nil upon nil...
Our right is but one:
To be rancorless sons
of our luckless and sad Russian land.
Let our grievances burn, rot, decay deep inside.
To the outside we'll spring living shoots, only then,
Looking up, will our Russia's fatigued countryside
See the sun it awaited so long.
-- Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn