Una señora

I'm now a married lady. Wow.

The wedding was beautiful, though I was incredibly nervous. In fact, I almost cried on my way down the staircase with my parents, and I didn't know where to look or if to smile or not as S and I walked to the table where the magistrate was waiting for us.

But now we are married, and we had a very nice party. My favorite part of dinner was the cake. Chocolate truffle cake. Delicious. I also enjoyed dancing with S and my brother, sister, S's cousins, my Dad, etc. I also enjoyed throwing the bouquet in part because my friend caught it, but also because it was just fun. I could be the center of attention but it wasn't uncomfortable - nor do I think it was for S.

So, yes, I am married. Wow. As I said to S, I don't feel any different, besides the nerves about the wedding being replaced with nerves about other things in life. But I am super happy. Super duper happy.

On this day angels sing

...with their song Earth shall ring, praising Christ Heaven's King, born on Earth to save us, peace and love he gave us...

Merry Christmas!

Yes, yes, I am still awake at 5:30 AM. We got home from visiting all of the relatives about an hour ago and having had a glass or two of cola de mono, I can't sleep.

Christmas here is so different from Christmas in the States. For all those people who complain about the commercialization of Christmas, come here. We've got nothing on the Chileans in the commercialization department.

My wedding is Saturday. My family arrives Tuesday. I am so excited!

I made snickerdoodles last night and my suegro has proceeded to eat about half of them. We all over ate at dinner, and then opened presents right at midnight. My suegro was watching his watch, which was amusing. Everyone seemed to like my presents so that is good. Hopefully they still like them tomorrow.

Given that the sun will be coming up soon, I should probably try to sleep. Oddly enough, Christmas day isn't really a big thing here. M was telling me that when she and my future husband were really young Christmas day was a bigger deal, but now it is all about Christmas eve. Christmas day is for lazing around and eating the leftovers from Christmas eve dinner. And we are painting the house tomorrow, because we are that cool. The three of us are also so cool that we can exhaust ourselves in 15 minutes of kicking the soccer ball around the plaza, and that I taught them both the words to "Santa Claus is coming to town" in English. Yes. Cool.

So - ¡Feliz Navidad! May your days be merry and bright, and may all your Christmases be white.

It's summer now.

I am in Chile now... and I have been for a few days now. It's hot hot hot during the day and I am still not over my micro-fobia. But it's nice to be with Seba.

We had the tasting for the wedding last night, which was very nice despite the fact that I was so nervous I could hardly eat anything. It will all be delicious, though. I am very excited about it all, but also nervous. It's a big step. But I'm excited about it. I'll be even more excited when my family gets here next week.

freedom!

Hmmmm have I mention that I am DONE DONE DONE?

It's an odd feeling.

I leave on Saturday... I turned in my grades today and took a gazillion books back to the library. Crazy.

I still have some shopping I need to get taken care of before I head off... though I had some people over this evening so that was a motivation to straighten up the living room, which is now quite nice. My bedroom, on the other hand, is if possible even messier than it was. But I can take care of that tomorrow. But, I'm free! Except for not. But it's nice not to have to read for class or grade anything. One more semester... :-)

!

As of 2:05 PM, I am done with my own academic work for the semester.

Unfortunately, my freedom is almost up - I have to give the final to my students at 7 tonight.

Should I read some Jane Austen during the exam, or something for school? I can't decide. 3 hours. of. sitting. there.

Dead dictators, done papers, plumbing and Advent, oh my!

Pinocho is dead... I know you shouldn't be happy about someone's death but I am certainly not sad that he is gone. It's hilarious to listen to the BBC people talk about it because they are sort of out of it - which makes me feel weird when I hear things from them about places I don't know as well, but I suppose superficiality is key in most areas when you have to try to cover the entire world. But he's gone!

Also finished (te hehe) is my paper. I did not, however, finish it before Lessons and Carols which was a disappointment, and I was up pretty late last night finishing it, but, oh, wait, it's done. Later today I'll just print it out to check for typos, and listo. I'm actually pretty pleased with the way it turned out. I do, of course, keep thinking of other works I could add to this study but I'm just going to have to leave it at this for now - I don't have the time to re-read all of that stuff to add it in! Besides which, I'm at the page limit.

My bathroom sink is backed up, which is a mystery to me and sort of disgusting. I brush my teeth in the shower. My friend brought over a plunger but that didn't help, nor did the vinegar and baking soda. The maintenance people came this morning but they woke me up - at 9:30! Shameful! But they are coming back after lunch, which should be any time now. However, I also got to do some organ prosletyzing with my friend, which is always fun. I forget that people usually just hear the music rather than knowing how it all works. Which is fine, but the way organs work is really cool!

Lessons and Carols! I love Advent, and the Lessons and Carols service is one of my favorites. Unfortunately the cold/allergies stuffiness kicked in after the second hymn so I couldn't project without my voice breaking, which was disappointing. The choir sang a piece that I hadn't heard before, it is called "Advent" and is music by Roland Martin set to a poem by Christina Rossetti:

Earth grown old, yet still so green
Deep deneath her crust of cold
Nurses fire unfelt, unseen:
Earth grown old.

We who live are quickly told:
Millions more lie hid between
Inner swathings of her fold.

When wil fire break up her screen?
When will life burst thro' her mould?
Earth, earth, earth thy cold is keen,
Earth grown old.

It was quite beautiful, and really brought back to me a comment someone made as to the links of our current Christmas celebrations and pagan winter rituals - I always chuckle to see the snow-themed displays in Chile in December when it is 85 degrees outside.

Speaking of Chile - I leave on Saturday. So exciting! 19 days!!

Chugging along...

Happily the writing block didn't last. Unhappily, I can't dedicate days and days to writing this paper, which is what I would prefer to do. I hate having to rush things. And even though I still have plenty of time, I feel like I am being forced to rush. I think back over the semester and wonder if there were another time I could have been working on this - and the answer is basically, no. I haven't really had much free time. I've been studying, writing other papers, reading for all of my classes, attending Grandma's memorial service, and getting ready to get married. All of those things take a lot of time. So while I am a bit annoyed with myself for not having worked on this more earlier, especially because I am really enjoying the work now that I am in the middle of it, realistically there is nothing else I could have done before. I need to have blocks of time to write - I am horrible at the sit down, write a paragraph, go do something else for a few days, come back and write the next one, etc. So today is a block, again. And though my goal had been to finish it by this evening, I think I have to admit that it isn't going to happen. So I'll be aiming for tomorrow afternoon before the Lessons and Carols service. We'll see how it goes.

For any of you who use MSN, you should try out the games. They are pretty fun. I especially enjoyed the Minesweeper - though I found the competitive Solitaire to be confusing, very confusing.

writer's block.

I'm totally blocked right now. I'm working on the last paper I need to write for this semester and even though (or perhaps because?) I have been thinking about it a great deal and have done all the research and have it mostly organized, I am finding it incredibly difficult to sit down and write anything that makes sense, which is incredibly frustrating.

Usually when I write a paper, I just start writing out an outline and/or writing myself a mini lit review that sometimes makes it into the final paper and sometimes doesn't. I tend to write everything all at once - I am actually quite bad and inefficient at writing a few pages here or there. This paper, however, is a lot more like my thesis was - rather than looking at one particular work or author, I'm taking bits and pieces from all over the place, so it is more difficult to start out at any one place, because there are so many different places to start. Do I want to work chronologically? Thematically? How do I want to introduce each writer? I am not a huge huge reviser, which is part of why I think it takes me so long to get started - I have to think it all out in my head and have it set. Most of my revising consists of just going back and checking for typos and sometimes rephrasing things, but I can't think of a time when I have had substantial content changes. There have been a lot of things out on the web recently about how academics write and revise, and I feel like I need to work on my revision skills. I'm great at revising other people's work - I just struggle with my own.

So now that I have written a nice, neat paragraph here about writing papers, perhaps I should return to staring at a blank page and trying to begin the actual thing. I can't even organize my sources anymore - I have them all organized in how I think I want the paper to go. I just need to write! Write! Write!

On an entirely unrrelated note - I just adore Colbert's Blitzkrieg on Grinchitude graphic. For those unlucky ones who may not have seen it - you have Santa Claus in his sleigh flying through the night sky, only to be shot down by a plane. But who saves the day? Jesus, who catches him in an open two seater to the strains of the Hallelujah Chorus. It's just hilarious. I adore it.

If only everyone read more

Today would have been my grandmother's birthday... but she is no longer with us, so I guess it's not.

However, Pinochet had a heart attack and will maybe die soon. I feel guilty about thinking that it is only fair that he die already so he can burn in hell... except that I have other issues with hell... but yeah. It's sort of odd.

1 paper is written, 1 is still but ideas floating around my head and books and articles strewn about my apartment floor. Luckily, I have some time to work on it still.

I couldn't resist another quiz:

What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.
Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Book Snob
Literate Good Citizen
Non-Reader
Fad Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz

PS. Michael's was absolutely crazy today. I got the 2nd to last wreath hanger thing for the door. And they were out of cookie tins. This is what I get for waiting until now to go... wait, no. This is what I get for going on a weekend day.

I'm money - or gold...

Because everyone knows I love to avoid grading. Especially big piles of it.









I guess it's good that I have a set of ethics and no desire to be dictator of the world. Because, obviously, I could do it. If I so chose. Right. Onto other musings - it is waaaay too warm to be late November. Seriously.

I will be a non-married person for only one more month - which is super exciting but also sort of odd - some of my friends here tease me that being married will make me old, which is ridiculous. But I am really just super super excited!

I consume popular culture afterall

When I returned home I happily found my mail waiting for me - one of the pieces was a bit I had ordered awhile ago, which included the Soda Stereo Unplugged CD. Let me tell you, it's just as great as I had hoped it would be. What would make me happy would be if Soda had a reunion concert, and I could go to it. That would be just fantastic. Unfortunately that will probably never happen - but I can wish, right??

As to my pop culture consumption, which in terms of the US is abysmally low (I watched CSI for the first time last week - fun!)... I have seen the new James Bond movie. Now, I admit that I was skeptical and that it was my brother's idea to go see it - I wanted (and still would like) to see The Queen. But I love the new James Bond, and Casino Royale as a film, as well. I like the action sequences a lot (the Parkour at the beginning was cool) and I tend to like darker movies. And I finally at long last can see Bond as a ladykiller. FX conveniently had on all sorts of the old Bond films so I was reminded of how not convinced I was. The closest to convinced I might get would be a younger Sean Connery, but even then I'm not terribly convinced. On the other hand, Daniel Craig, you are an excellent James Bond. You've got the ladykiller part down, you're a cold and ruthless killer, and you play well off the other actors... I'd even go see the film again. I might even venture to get it on DVD. And I'll happily look forward to the next Bond film.

So now Steve in Coupling might have to revise his definition of being a "bloke" - instead of preferring Sean Connery as the best James Bond, he might have to allow some preferences for the new aesthetic. :-)

PS: I can't believe I just wrote a post about James Bond. That should say it all.

Black Friday

Happy belated Thanksgiving to those few who read this.

Grandma having passed away certainly put a cramp in the holidays.

The plans were to do lots of wedding stuff... most of which has not been done. Some of it has - but not nearly as much as I wanted to, and I feel like I haven't been here hardly at all. Perhaps that is due to the fact that the first two days of my *vacation* were spent driving the 7 hours to the memorial service and the 7 hours back, which was really just exhausting.

Despite that frustration... and many other little frustrations (I am so used to not living with my siblings, though I really love them lots)... it has been a pleasant and even almost relaxing time. I don't know why I brought all those books with me - wait, yes I do. I'm obsessive. But I haven't looked at most of them the whole trip. And tomorrow I get to try to pack it all back in again for the really really long trip back to my house.

PS I was all about FX's That 70's Show marathon. Best. Show. Ever.

1910 - 2006

My grandmother died today.

Though it sounds callous, I am at the point where I would just say, God was merciful.

She hasn't known who any of us are for ages, she hasn't really been Grandma for nearly a decade. I fear that there will be fighting now that she's gone, and there have been some (major) disagreements about her care. I also feel somewhat guilty because I never really liked Grandma. I thought she was a mean and bitter old woman who liked someone other than me best. I have three happy memories of her:

1. She would garden peacefully while us kids ran around her backyard.
2. She used to stand at the kitchen sink at our house pitting cherries that we had picked from our cherry tree.
3. Sweets at her house. She made wonderful cookies that were always at a level in the pantry that we could reach. Also, we would always get ice cream at her house - vanilla ice cream with Hershey's syrup from a tin, and we got to use special gold ice cream spoons. I lost my first tooth while eating that ice cream.

Other than that, I really just have impressions of her. She always had the same hairstyle that I swear no one else has used since the 40's. My time at her house I remember more for hanging out with my siblings and cousin than for hanging out with her. I remember horrible things she said, like a woman can't be a doctor because she would be taking a job away from a man. I can't even remember what her voice sounded like, and I regret that.

All of my grandparents have gone from me, now. My paternal grandfather has been gone almost 17 years, my maternal grandmother 13, my maternal grandfather 5, and now my paternal grandmother is gone, too. I'm not quite sure how to mourn her, since she has been effectively dead for years - what has been an affective and emotional fact for ages is now physical. I'm angry and I'm sad, and I feel guilty for not having liked her better. I dread having to get the family together and the problems that will ensue. But for now, I am just going to remember that she hasn't really been Grandma for years, and that God finally thought it was time.

Books and more books

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I love to read, and anyone who is either A. family or best friend or B. knew me before college knows that I have had a long love affair with fantasy and s/f writing. So, it caught my eye when the Science Fiction Book Club puts up a list of "Most Significant" Books of the past 50 years. Well, I know that I avoid certain types of books (or just Harlan Ellison for being a boor) and I have an affinity for things written by women... but anyways. I'm bolding that which I HAVE read.

The Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien
The Foundation Trilogy, Isaac Asimov
Dune, Frank Herbert
Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert A. Heinlein
A Wizard of Earthsea, Ursula K. Le Guin
Neuromancer, William Gibson
Childhood’s End, Arthur C. Clarke
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, Philip K. Dick
The Mists of Avalon, Marion Zimmer Bradley
Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
The Book of the New Sun, Gene Wolfe
A Canticle for Leibowitz, Walter M. Miller, Jr.
The Caves of Steel, Isaac Asimov
Children of the Atom, Wilmar Shiras
Cities in Flight, James Blish
The Colour of Magic, Terry Pratchett
Dangerous Visions, edited by Harlan Ellison
Deathbird Stories, Harlan Ellison
The Demolished Man, Alfred Bester
Dhalgren, Samuel R. Delany
Dragonflight, Anne McCaffrey
Ender’s Game, Orson Scott Card
The First Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever, Stephen R. Donaldson
The Forever War, Joe Haldeman
Gateway, Frederik Pohl
Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, J.K. Rowling
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
I Am Legend, Richard Matheson
Interview with the Vampire, Anne Rice
The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. Le Guin
Little, Big, John Crowley
Lord of Light, Roger Zelazny
The Man in the High Castle, Philip K. Dick
Mission of Gravity, Hal Clement
More Than Human, Theodore Sturgeon
The Rediscovery of Man, Cordwainer Smith
On the Beach, Nevil Shute
Rendezvous with Rama, Arthur C. Clarke
Ringworld, Larry Niven
Rogue Moon, Algis Budrys
The Silmarillion, J.R.R. Tolkien
Slaughterhouse-5, Kurt Vonnegut
Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson
Stand on Zanzibar, John Brunner
The Stars My Destination, Alfred Bester
Starship Troopers, Robert A. Heinlein
Stormbringer, Michael Moorcock
The Sword of Shannara, Terry Brooks I feel like I read it but I'm not sure.
Timescape, Gregory Benford
To Your Scattered Bodies Go, Philip Jose Farmer

Given that this list only has 6 books written by women on it... well yeah. I always find it interesting that a genre that I have always considered very non-academic for me - it's my fun reading, along with the Bronte sisters, Jane Austen, and Thomas Hardy - is so, well, canonized. And who gets to decide the canon? Because my canon would be very different - I imagine all individuals might have their own idea of what the canon should be.

Last weekend I was driving a car of middle school girls and I nearly missed the exit because I got so excited - because they were talking about books! My best friend in middle school and I definitely connected about books - especially about scifi and fantasy. When we no longer lived in the same place, most of our correspondence was writing stories about characters we had created together and sending it to eachother. I was thrilled to hear the girls talking about these books - they are reading a lot of the same books I read when I was their age - and to be able to participate in the conversation and even suggest some new books to look into. Ah, reading. It's really great.

one word

You can only type one word. No explanations.

1. Yourself:

loving

2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend.....

almost-married

3. Your hair?

color?

4. Your mother?:

awesome

5. Your Father:

sweet

6. Your Favorite Item:

rings

7. Your dream last night:

dream?

8. Your Favorite drink:

wine

9. Your Dream Car:

saab

10. The room you are in:

comfy

11. Your Ex:

ex?

12. Your fear:

failing

13. What you want to be in 10 years:

successful

14. Who you hung out with last night?

books

15. What You're Not?

lazy

16. Muffins:

blueberry

17: One of Your Wish List Items:

books!

18: Time:

insufficient

19. The Last Thing You Did:

typed

20. What You Are Wearing:

tshirt

21. Your Favorite Weather:

fal

22. Your Favorite Book:

jausten

23. The Last Thing You Ate:

wine

24. Your Life:

happy

25. Your Mood:

happy

26. Your best friend (s):

amazing

27. What are you thinking about right now?

water

28. Your car:

none

29. What are you doing at the moment?

chatting

30. Your summer:

workign

31. Your relationship status:

fulfilled

32. What is on your tv?

off

33. What is the weather like?

night

34. When is the last time you laughed?

now

I'm still giddy.

As it turns out, my blue balloons were not at all inappropriate. I am so very happy that we have returned to what William Safire called "our renewed two-party nation." Oh, Democrats. Now let's do as much to fix the mess as well and as quickly as possible.

I'm chaperoning the middle school weekend again this year - and it is this weekend. I am excited about it because it is time away and it was a really good experience with the kids last year, but I don't know all the kids going this year - because they are from one of the classes that I don't teach. Either way, it should be interesting. Unfortunately it is supposed to rain on Saturday... I am hoping that it doesn't, but you never know.

PS when I found out Allen conceded, I totally did a hop, skip, and a jump. Literally. It was awesome.

Late night election returns obsessing

Oh elections. I really love democracy. And I love it even more when people I vote for win, which isn't always the case today but on the national scale, things aren't going too badly.

WE WON BACK THE HOUSE! Hello, Speaker Pelosi! You, a woman (gasp!) are third in line to be President. That is all kinds of awesome.

What is also cool right now is that the test of the abortion ban in South Dakota appears to be going the way of saying the ban is too restrictive... while I'm still not going to crow about that one, there is hope!

I'm nervous about TN, MO, and VA. Allen is ahead of Webb by only a few thousand votes... though if Allen wins that will be sad. On the negative side, evidentally this country hates people in committed relationships - because the same sex marriage crap keeps passing, which is depressing. Stem cell research is failing (barely) but on the positive side, MO is poised to raise it's minimum wage and a friend told me that CO is going yes for legalizing marijuana (that surprised me).

But I'll still enjoy my cascade of blue balloons, because now we will have a stronger opposition! Bush won't be able to screw us up as much! Though now the Dems have to figure out what it is they are doing. I'll vote for them, but that doesn't mean that they have their plan all set out.

PS Despite my overall pleasure that the Dems have control of the House, I worry that these new Dems may be too conservative for me too... and I don't know how the gender balance (or lack thereof) is affected by these races - I know some female Republican incumbents have lost their seats, but also some female challengers have won... I'll wait for the dust to settle on that one.

Vote!

Tomorrow, as everyone who doesn't have their head under a rock should know, is election day. I voted a few weeks ago via absentee ballot, but if you are a registered voter, and have not voted absentee (or early? what is that? weird) then be sure to vote tomorrow!!!

And no, three exclamation points is not excessive. Though I worry as much about the security threats and potential disenfranchisement of electronic voting as much as the next person...

Though what is excessive are people not following express directions. That kinda gets on my nerves a lot.

Why I still love school

So today was just awesome.

Since I entered Grad School, I have been exposed to the variety of my field, and while I find it mostly all interesting, I am still pretty much really into what I was really into when I came here. Perhaps I have a bit more knowledge about the larger context, and I have certainly read a lot more, but my interests are pretty much the same.

I still enjoy reading everything - because I enjoy reading, because the history of the text is interesting, because there are all sorts of elements that contribute to what I am interested in, and history, intertextual issues, and connections in general have a lot to do with it. However, at least last year, it was really hard for me to tailor my big projects to my own scholarly tastes. Part of that was due to the fact that I didn't have as clear a focus within my interests as I do now; however, part of it was that I didn't have the materials or ability to make the necessary connections.

This semester is totally different. Both of my big projects relate to my greater interests quite explicitly, and in fact are opening up new approximations to my original interests that I hadn't considered before. I admit, I'm excited about both of them. So. excited. Yes, I'm a big academic dork but I'm OK with that.

Last year, all of the speakers who came gave presentations about things I didn't really have a background in, or a great deal of interst, though I did try. However, today was just awesome. Why, you might ask? Because the speaker who came is working on people I work on, but from a perspective that I hand't considered before. I got to have lunch with this individual before the lecture and it was really fascinating to chat about all of these things that I am really passionate about (academically) with another professional in the field - up to this point, my dorky academic happiness moments have come with one particular grad student who also has interests similar to mine. So you might say that both of us had really exciting and good days. I also loved that the speaker was really interested in what we had to say, which though I admire a lot of my professors, is not always evident in our interactions. I just feel very engaged in the profession right now and I think I have made my first out of department that I have studied in academic contact. Plus, I'm super excited about an article idea. Super excited. Just you all see.

I'm so excited that the cold doesn't even bother me. Awesome!

Happy day

Oh, I love red wine. If anyone serves me white wine... well I just won't drink it. So I do find myself chuckling when I read all of these articles that have come out in the past few weeks about the health benefits of red wine (and white wine, people? See, red is better).

It is also November 1 (as you would note from looking at the date of this entry) and too warm. This is sick. As I was saying to my sister, it really needs to start getting colder. Not because I want to turn on the heat, but because it is just weird that it is warm right now. I want my winter, and I want it now. Though I will probably not say the same thing come February.

For whatever (multiple) reason, I am very happy right now. I feel on top of things, I get to see my family in a few weeks, I'm getting married(!) in less than two months, I feel like I am prepared for next semester, I am reading a book for *fun* (OK not really, there is a lecture about it but it is a book I have read for pleasure in the past), my students make me laugh, and life is good, despite the random warmness.

Happy Halloween

Well, it's Halloween. Mish.

I am randomly very pleased that I don't have to read the entire (very boring) text that I am not particularly interested in. Yes, I love school, but it's hard to stay awake when I am bored.

Does anyone want to tell me why we have temperatures in the 70's in late October? Yeah. Skirt and flipflops were definitely out again today. Which is just odd.

The flowers that my friends gave me for my birthday are still blooming. In fact, there are still buds that haven't opened. They're gorgeous and brighten my house.

Woohoo for the STL Cardinals

Yay! The Cardinals finally won the World Series. :-)

I admit, I don't really like baseball. But I do like the Cardinals. And they won! Yay!

Brrrrr

Oh, it has gotten colder. The bright autumnal sunlight decieves me as I sit here at my computer sniffling and wondering where my gloves are to wear inside the house... I don't want to turn the heat on until November, but I might have to earlier than I had planned. Harumph.

I still love autumn, though. And my sweaters and my closed-toe shoes. And being older, too.

This week makes me feel as if I were an undergraduate again - in the fact that I have all sorts of things due all the time and I never feel like I have enough time to get it all done, which is ridiculous since I am always doing work and I am efficient and well organized. After tomorrow, though, I will be in better shape, or so I hope.

Until then...

Thinking

I'm still older. :-)

results of a BBC quiz about the ways we think. It's somewhat entertaining, I admit. Evidentally I'm a "Renaissance thinker" - which I take to mean that I want to know everything about everything.

On the subject of random things (yes, the picture is also random) - does anyone else find certain numbers to be aesthetically pleasing? It's very odd to me but I think part of it has to do with how I think of numbers - I have always associated them with colors. And for some reason I find certain numbers to be more aesthetically pleasing than others - not in the way it is written necessarily but rather in the way I visualize it in my mind. For example, I find the number 14 to be quite attractive.

Another year passes

Yay! Today I am... older. And let me tell you, older doesn't feel any different than it did yesterday.

Yesterday was a good day. It was sunny, I got up early, and I got a lot of work done, which is always a plus. Then, since I am cool enough to have the same birthday as a friend of mine, we had a nice celebration at a local wine bar. I enjoyed it, I think the people who came had a nice time, and I am happy. Even though S "forgot" that today was my birthday. No, he didn't forget, it is just a joke.

So I am older. Go me!

Colbert Breaks Down Santorums Lord of the Rings Analogy

Save Middle Earth from Sauron = Midterm elections?

Friday! Crisp! Fall!

So there were weird people in the church again today. I mean, whatever people can be wherever in the church, it's a House of God but I found it odd considering the only thing on the *calendar* is a different meeting in the evening... I do wonder who they are. And why they feel the need to speak loudly and close/slam doors?

Besides that - I managed not to kill my feet (always a plus), have my travel mug go flying the in hallway (way to watch where I am going), and eat peanut butter MnMs before 11 AM. All in all, not a bad day. If only I could snap my fingers and have everything else I have to do this weekend just be done, so I can do all that other stuff I want to do, too.

I know, I ask too much.

aaaaaaaayyyy

So - next week is not a happy week for me at least in terms of having time to like, breathe. But then it'll all be fine... because all the bureaucratic crap has gotten straightened out... among other things. but yeah. ugh.

Locos por el baile has eliminations starting today - and I'm not a huge fan of eliminations. The only reality I watched was the Granja VIP, and there were just some people on there that I didn't want to see on the screen anymore. But I like watching everyone dance, even though I think some of the judges are... um... too sensitive in their personal pride.

However, as nothing is coming to mind as I am typing, I suppose it is time to go back to the program, and to reading.

Realms of clearer light

I really do enjoy playing the organ. I am shy about playing it in front of people, which would seem to go against the nature of the instrument - oddly, I am fine as long as I can't see or hear other people while I'm playing. I'm sort of like that with piano, too, though. It tends to be when it is unexpected, though - when Grandma was sitting on the couch by the piano when I was younger, it was fine, but when she suddenly appeared it threw me off.

Anyways - there were random people running around the church making noise while I was practicing, which unfortunately did affect my concentration a bit. However, I realized I haven't put any poetry up recently, mostly because I already put up my favoritest poem, and there haven't really been any others that caught my eye - except for hymn texts.

This is an Easter hymn (I know, random that I have it here in Pentecost, but whatever) that I just love, if you know the hymnal it's something like 209(?), the tune is St. Botolph. The first line comes from 2 Cornithians 5:7 - well here it is, adapted from Henry Alford (1810-1871).

We walk by faith, and not by sight;
no gracious words we hear from him
who spoke as none e'er spoke;
but we believe him near.

We may not touch his hands and side,
nor follow where he trod;
but in his promise we rejoice;
and cry, "My Lord and God!"

Help then, O Lord, our unbelief;
and may our faith abound,
to call on you when you are near,
and seek where you are found:

that, when our life of faith is done,
in realms of clearer light
we may behold you as you are,
with full and endless sight.

Why is it that I really like this hymn text? I admit, I love hymns, but I tend to love them for the tunes rather than the words, though usually it is a combination of the two. This is the one hymn that I can really identify with, I'm not sure if it is because of the whole help our unbelief part, but I really do just feel connected to this text. Perhaps at a later point I'll be able to articulate that more clearly, but for now, I'll just read it again.

Fun article

Hey people, enjoy a fun article about one of my favorite hacks, Stephen Colbert.

Dreams of sweet beverages

My life has been study-centric lately. However, I have another entertaining anecdote to share with the Internets.

S really, really loves Cherry Coke. They don't sell it in Chile, and unlike Dr. Pepper (hmmm DDP, I love it!) which he hates with a passion, he really likes Cherry Coke. For whatever reason, they don't appear to be selling it in any of the supermarkets in my area anymore, which is weird, but OK to the anecdote.

S was telling me about a dream he had a few days ago. While he'll have to correct me with details, it involved his sister (who also, I believe, enjoys Cherry Coke) and his quest for a Cherry Coke. I admit, I found it quite amusing. I laughed a bit.

Also in S-world - he got to go see Robbie Williams last night, which sounded like fun. Much more fun than my working on schoolwork. Though I did watch Locos por el baile, the Chilean version of Dancing with the stars. Let me tell you, Locos por el baile is a gazillion times more entertaining.

el orgullo de tener una banda roja que nos cruce el alma...

Hmmm so if you read closesly my On Notice board (thank you, Stephen Colbert), you might have noticed that Boca Juniors is on there. Well... they still are! And why, you might ask, besides the fact that they are the archrivals of my favorite soccer team? Since you asked...

RIVER PLATE won this year's derby, that is Superclasico. 3-1. I haven't seen the game yet (boo) but I have high hopes of seeing a tape/DVD of it in the near future. And I hear from quite reputable sources (Dad) that they played well. I'm relieved. I love my team, but they make me sad when they don't do well, as was the case at the beginning of the season. But they are doing much better now - in fact, they might actually do OK this tournament. So there I am pleased. (Hm despite Ortega's issues with alchocol abuse...) Besides which, I am almost always pleased when Boca loses to River, because, c'mon, River is just better.

Farmer's golf

I heard a very interesting/amusing piece on Marketplace yesterday. I especially enjoy the fact that if you make a hole in one, you would theoretically win a tractor. And that no one has ever made one.

Oh how fun!

How marvelous! You can even make your own here. And yes, Boca Juniors always suck. No matter what. They're On Notice. :-D

K the entertainer

Oh, I love entertaining. And I love my friends.

I don't feel as lonely as I used too. I made a delicious recipe of my father's (go Dad!) to celebrate (a bit late) a birthday and it was a great hit, great company, and I am pleased. Yummy! And I have the leftovers to eat now for the next few days, which is excellent.

My weeks can be so busy... at least, Monday to Wednesday. I always feel somewhat relieved when I get to Wednesday nights - besides showing "Locos por el baile," which after my teleserie is one of my favorite programs, I feel like I finally have time to worry about everything I am working on. From Monday to Wednesday, I feel like I have barely enough time to teach and go to my own classes, and eat. Though there are "holes" in my schedule these days, they are not work time at all. But now I have great swathes of work time! And it's awesome!

Secret message to the world: Bureaucracy sucks, and funcionarios chilenos can kiss my... well we shall see how things resolve themselves tomorrow. But I am not happy with them, not one bit.

My kitchen is part of my kingdom

I am yet again experimenting in my kitchen this afternoon.

Yesterday, I made an approximation of a churro or cuchufli, which was delicious but I did have some challenges to overcome (mainly, that I hate frying things and hence am bad at it) and my house still has the lingering smell of fried foods, which isn't too pleasant. While today's challenge does require a small bit of frying, it really is a small bit.

So what is it that I am planning to make? POTSTICKERS! My favoritest food. I've made them at home with my parents with an actual recipe before, but this will be the first time I have done them on my own. I hope they turn out well.

For those that might not know about my very happy relationship with potstickers - when I was smaller and we went to a Chinese buffet sometimes on the weekends, it was all you can eat, my parents only had to pay for the little kid price (because I was at that point in life a little kid), and I would clear the place out of potstickers. I just love them. Also interestingly, I remember calling them "Peking Ravioli" when we were small - and that is evidentally a term unique to Boston (thanks to Joyce Chen). I, of course, had no idea. But now I'm going to try to not make my kitchen too messy since I finally got it cleaned up from yesterday, and to enjoy whatever masterpiece might result.

*UPDATED* I finished my delicious potstickers. And they are mine, all mine! And they are delicious. I am pleased. Here's a pretty picture:


My cell phone doesn't take awesome pictures, but there you have it. So I bought some Mirin (=sweet sake) at the grocery to use in my cooking and - get this - they didn't card me for it. I think it's the first time in life that I have bought something with alcohol in it at the grocery and they didn't ask for ID. I don't think it is because I look any older though - they probably didn't realize Mirin is 8% Alc. by volume. Either way, I just realized that, just now. And it made me laugh.

Earth is awesome

See that shiny dot? That's Earth from Saturn. It's awesome. Go APOD!

We can be smart, too

A few observations from this morning... OK only one because the others are just student things (Yes, class ends on time. And no, I will not go to your party.)

Perhaps I am just of the younger and more technology obsessed generation of graduate students, but it's kind of ridiculous that people send emails to a school list complaining about it being MAJOR SPAM! (direct quote), and six or seven people ditto that, and on and on... YOU ARE THE SPAMMER, dear email sender. Please stop. Like, now.

Though I can laugh at them. And I do.

For smart people, we can be sort of stupid sometimes, can't we?

Xao to yet another enjoyable teleserie

Xao, Descarado.


My teleserie since March has ended. While at times it was confusing and it definitely didn't get the ratings it deserved, I truly enjoyed it. Descarado, you were the (relatively) thinking person's teleserie. And I enjoyed watching you. I just wish more people did, too.

I appreciated the science fiction story line, as well as many strong female characters that are not particularly typical, shall we say, in my favorite television shows. And though I'm surprised at some of the ways things worked out, I am overall pleased with what happened. Silvina stayed on the island with her adopted family, R2 got back his original face (and is now Rafael) and stayed with Silvina, Franco left the lucrative business to Pantaleon, Renato went away and is alone alone alone because he is a bad person, and Carmen (A7) and Amanda switched so Carmen stays with Mauro and Amanda with T9 (whose real name we still don't know). Franco stays with Ana Maria, and Tomas and Carolyne are getting married... basically, most things are well. And I'll miss the entertainment.

I feel this way everytime a teleserie that I follow ends, though. I felt this way with Machos, and then with Brujas, and then with Gatas y tuercas, and now with Descarado. Though I admit, style wise, I really like Silvina and Carmen in Descarado. They made me think about getting bangs. Not that I would, but I have thought about it. They're that powerful. And strong women! Yes! So Charly Tango, I have some high expectations of you. Please live up to them.

Elitism

It is somewhat odd that I can connect Mark Zuckerburg to the Higher Education Report. But oh, I can.

First to Mark Zuckerburg. For my (few) readers who might not know, this is the guy who came up with facebook. I admit, I like facebook, I like being able to keep in touch with friends from college and reconnect with people I knew when I was younger. Realistically, without this medium, I would have lost a lot of these contacts. However, this whole opening to the whole world really defeats the purpose of the service. If you want to be connected to the whole world, then you go to myspace. Facebook was first for "elite" colleges, then for most all colleges, then for high schoolers, too, then for some businesses, and now... I am not arguing that Facebook was some utopian online community where there weren't weird people (oh there were and are), but if you create a niche product (which is what it arguably was), then why do you make it leave its niche when there are other products available that serve the non-niche market?

Add to this the fact that every time I hear the guy speak, I want to throw something. Perhaps he is aware of it and perhaps he is not, but his tone is really quite arrogant and frustrating. When it's available, listen to the way he says things on his NPR Morning Edition interview. Yes, he wants us to use our service, but he obviously *knows* better than we do what it is that we want. He can do whatever he wants with the business model, but when it comes to reading the minds of millions of college students (and now, the world!), please. Learn humility, because you certainly don't show it.

So what, you might ask, does this have to do with the Higher Education Commission's report? There has been much written about the report in various venues, some extolling the report, others taking it down point by point, and yet others showing something approximating a middle ground. I think that the problem with the Higher Education Commission's report is that it fails to recognize what the varied purposes of higher education are. Perhaps my view is slanted, because I did attend and succeed at one of the "elite" schools. Perhaps I have higher expectations than I should of what students should know and be able to do coming out of high school. Perhaps I am bitter that this Commission appears to care more about the degree as a certification towards getting a better job without considering the vast range of motivations behind attending colleges of any kind. Again, I'm biased towards the liberal arts, learn for learning's sake form of higher education. But the idea of testing a liberal arts education mandated by the government doesn't sit right with me.

Why, you might ask, does it not sit well with me? I think standardized testing is inherently flawed as it reinforced societal biases, as well as taking valuable classroom time away from actual pedagogical exercise to teach students how to succeed on said standardized tests. Higher education, though today used as just another credential to get a job, isn't necessarily for everyone. There, I said it. Call me elitist if you well, but not everyone is suited or desires the challenges that higher education provides. In the ideal world, employers would not require a bachelor's degree if the job did not require skills and knowledge acquired through said degree. However, we do not live in an ideal world. Employers' demands and business world trained trustees and administrators have, in my mind unfortunately, changed the atmosphere of higher education as have student expectations of a product or services. News flash to the world: education is not fundamentally a business enterprise. It should not be run as such. We need to value actual learning outcomes and processes; I especially emphasize the processes as they are many times much more useful in life than the actual outcomes.

So, in this mania to quantify and assess everything, how can we assess a learning process? In my mind, we shouldn't even have to assess it, but the presence in higher education of many students who are not there to learn, but rather to get the degree, would necessitate such action. My gut reaction as someone who loves learning and had to sit in classes with people who really didn't would be to get rid of the people who don't want to learn, but that would only help the small number of us who actually appear to care about learning. To be honest, I am not sure that most higher education is necessarily "broken" right now, with the exception of the high price tag and partisan (ahem Horowitz) attacks on academics. As much as I would love to live in a world where all students wanted to learn, realistically, that would never happen. I admit, I don't have a solution. I think whoever does would be an awesome person, but that no one would ever listen. Because that happens.

Another issue brought up by the Commission's suggestion of assessment of outcomes is a placement of worth on higher education. Specifically, it deals with a single body standardizing an infinite number of varieties in curriculum and specialization. It also brings ideological issues into play much more starkly than in the current system; in a field such as my own, who decides what the canon is? This is infinitely problematic within my own field and is constantly being revisited and revised; no program has the exact same canonical list. How can a governmental body assume that a student in X literature should know A, B, and C? Would that not just reinforce simplistic understandings of material and make ideological judgments of the worth of A, B, and C, not to mention J, K, and L that were left off the test?

The connection between these disparate ideas? Both Mark Zuckerburg and the Commission's narrow view of worth in higher education are "reforms" that ostensibly democratize their areas, that is, facebook and higher education. However, these entities thrive on elitism! Removing the intellectual from both of these removes the unique identity of both. Making facebook open to everyone defeats the purpose of the service. Everyone having equal ACCESS to higher education is key. However, the people of the US need to recognize that our country is not filled with people who want to study for itself, rather, they study for the certificate and learn nothing along the way. If we truly wish to reform higher education, it should be from within each institution (as opposed to governmentally imposed) with a focus as to the profile of student that it serves. The function of a community college is dramatically different from that of an R1 university.

All of this worry about the *quality* of higher education, in my mind, is not really important until we get our K-12 system to a better place. How can we expect students to succeed in higher education when they do not recieve the tools to do so in K-12? The answer is not to lower the expectations in higher education, for that hurts everyone involved. Hold students, teachers, administrators, parents, politicans (ugh school boards) accountable, but don't limit imagination through excessive testing. And don't forget that we don't all have to be the same thing in the end.

And it's Monday night.

I've gone into crazy study mode... which is fine, I guess, but I do find myself wondering what it is I was doing before I was in study mode. It's somewhat odd.

I've also lately felt quite lonely. Though I am doing well what with school and all, I really miss S, and my parents, and my siblings, and yeah. To be honest, I prefer to be alone if I can't be with S or my family. I'm not sure if that is a good thing, though.

I had to watch El Crimen del Padre Amaro which I have seen several times before, and it was quite interesting yet again. I did, however, get quite annoyed when reading through IMDB's reader reviews - over half of them were Latin American males (who of course have to proclaim their condition as such for *credibility*) who say that the movie is bad because the characters are poorly drawn, it's too much like a telenovela, it shouldn't criticize the Church, it should criticize other types of corruption because religion *doesn't matter,* etc, etc. Besides their attempts to establish authority, they had vapid comments that did not contribute to a coherent view of the film. Besides which, if they had paid attention to detail while they were watching the film, they might understand it better. Then they complain that nothing was resolved in the end - without realizing it is not the point for everyone to live happily ever after. While they complain about it being too much like a telenovela, they don't like it when it doesn't resolve as a telenovela would. If you are going to go out of your way to write a comment about a film, at least be consistent.

I do admit, I have quite a bit more to say about the film. And I know that I didn't qualify all of my above statements, despite my complaint about consistency in online film criticism - though part of it may have to do with different definitions of criticism. For me it is more about interpretation, whereas for many of these reviewers, it is simply about complaints. I did, however, appreciate the comment that brought Brechtian theory into it. Also - why were there no women writing these reviews? Yet another mystery to be solved...

Quick update

This weekend has been somewhat, well, odd. I spent most of yesterday working on a paper topic, and went to a very late concert with a friend. While it was nice to be out with my friend, I will admit the music wasn't what I expected, at all. But it was a nice time, just somewhat odd.

This morning I got installed as a church school teacher. Go us. Though they didn't put any of the teachers above 5th grade in the bulletin. But I am OK with that, since half the time they print my name they manage to spell it incorrectly. Oh, well.

The rest of my day is scheduled for studying and cooking. Hopefully more studying than cooking.

Darth Colbert

You can't go wrong with this clip. It joins two of the things I appreciate most - Star Wars and criticizing Bush. Enjoy!

the chef

Continuing with my fondness for faux-ethnic food (ie recipes that I sort of make up myself - were I a chef, I might call them something fusion, but I'm not), I made a bastardized version of Sukiyaki, which the Joy of Cooking book as well as about.com inform me is known as the "Japanese Friendship Dish." Now, I am not overly fond of Japanese food, mostly because I don't eat anything that comes out of the sea or shoreline. I do, however, like gyoza, as well as beef. Hmmm beef. So I made Sukiyaki, to my own tastes.

My version had beef, tofu (yay for protein), scallions, onions, water chestnuts, and bamboo shoots. I just used broth, soy sauce, and sugar for the bit at the end. And I admit, it was mighty delicious. I just finished it up for lunch. And it was still mighty delicious. So here I have yet another recipe that I like. A lot. I did leave out the raw egg part, which didn't appeal to me. And I couldn't find some ingredients that I might want to try in my next one. Either way it was lots of fun, partially because I had never cooked with tofu before.

Leaves aren't quite falling but

Happy Autumn! Arriving to this day means that we have (in the Northern Hemisphere, at least) survived the hell that is summer weather and are now moving into the *best* time of year! The air gets cooler and crisper, and there is just something that makes me happy in the scent on a crisp fall day. I don't know what it is, to be exact, but it is one of my favorite moments. Huzzah for autumn!

Sniff

Things were going so well. And then I wake up all stuffy again. Not cool.

Was it S having to blow his nose every 5 minutes over the phone? Can you transmit a cold through a phone line and across continents? Or are my allergies back? ugh. This sucks.

Chilean Independence and Medieval storytelling...

Feliz 18! Today is Chilean Independence Day. I wish I were there so that I could have the day off, spend it with family, have asado, drink pisco sour, chicha, and wine, dance cueca, and basically enjoy myself.

I have been watching a lot of Cadfael recently. It is ostensibly a way to "get into" an early 13th century Spanish text, but I really just like Cafael a lot. Unfortunately the library doesn't have all of the episodes - there are only two left there that I haven't watched yet. Oh, I love Cadfael. As much as I enjoy Poirot and other Mystery! series, I really like Cadfael best. Woohoo for Derek Jacobi as a Benedictine monk who solves crimes, usually murder. Je, je.

They had so many books...

I saw something very cute this morning. A mother and her son were walking out of one of the libraries on campus and the boy pointed to another building, which also happens to be a library, and asked what was there. His mother said "That is another library, because they have so many books that they didn't all fit in there!" (there being the library they just left) The little boy grinned, said "cool!" and started running towards the other building.

Seriously, it warmed my heart.

Random information, in chapters!

These are silly, but I want a break from Medieval Spanish Poetry. I especially appreciate that it is broken into chapters.

1. Where did you take or get your profile picture?
Woohoo for Yahoo Avatars. Especially when I get to make "me" wear leggings. But not those stirrup leggings, those were uncomfortable when I was a kid.
2. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Brown corduroys, blue lace trim tank top under a dark red vneck. Plus garnet earrings and my favorite necklace (faith, hope, and love!), watch, 2 rings.
3. What is your current problem?
oooh dear... I suppose the most current one is the pile of dishes in the sink.
4. What makes you most happy?
Being with S, playing organ or piano, dancing, seeing good films, watching my teleserie, being with my family... Republicans losing... so many little every day things, too.
5. What's the name of the song that you're listening to?
Well I am now listening to NPR's All Things Considered, but before that came on a bit ago I was listening to Camille Saint-Saëns' Rhapsodies (3) on Breton Themes for organ.
6. Has anyone you've been really close with passed away?
well, my grandparents...
7. Do you ever watch MTV?
Present tense? No.
8. What's something that really annoys you?
Oh so many things... but most of all, rude people. In other words, people sucking, that would be the #1 annoying thing in my life.

Chapter 1: All About Me
1. Middle name: I've got 2!
2. Nickname(s): I hate nicknames.
3. Current location: Here
4. Eye color: Green (duh. Look at the avatar...)

Chapter 2: Family
1. Do you live with your parents?: No, they are far away. :-(
2. Do you get along with your parent(s)?:Yes. Basically, my parents are awesome.
3. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?: No one's business but theirs, but I will say that I see them as a model of a good marriage.
4. Do you have any Siblings?: Oh si. 2.

Chapter 3: favourite...
1. Ice Cream: CHOCOLATE. Though just chocolate, I don't like it with nuts or any of that crap. Occasionally fudge swirl strikes my fancy, though.
2. Season: Fall!
3. Shampoo/conditioner: Hm. I like Redken's Fresh Curls, but I don't use it all the time for budgetary reasons.

Chapter 4: Do You..
1. Dance in the shower?: Dance? No. Sing? yes.
2. Write on your hand?: No, Dad's yelling at me for it finally broke me of the habit. That, and it hurts!
3. Call people back?: I try to.
4. Believe in love?: Yes, obvio.
5. Sleep on a certain side of the bed: Usually. Except for when I decide to sleep in the middle.
6. Any bad habits?: If you know me, you know what most of them are.

Chapter 5: Have You...
1. Broken a bone?: No. I'm that cool.
2. Sprained stuff?: Have I? I don't think that time in elementary school was really a sprain.
3. Had physical therapy?: I don't think so.
4. Gotten stitches?: Nope.
5. Taken Pain killers?: Ibuprofen! Acetominophen! (note that I use the generic names, jejeje.)
6. Gone SCUBA diving or snorkeling?: eh no.
7. Been stung by a bee?: Yes, once, I was about 5 and it was going after my soda, which was unacceptable. But then, oddly enough, the adult put a closed cold can of soda on the sting. Hm. Yes, odd.
8. Thrown up at the dentist?: Yuck, no.
9. Sworn in front of your parents?: Have I? I don't think so but I might be mistaken.
10. Had detention?: Of course not.

Chapter 6: Who/What was the last
1. Movie(s)?: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. (i've had a lot of reading)
2. Person to text you?: S
3. Person you called?: Student loan peeps
4. Person you hugged?: Was it S? because that means I haven't hugged anyone in a long time.
5. Person you tackled?: I generally don't tackle people.
6. Thing you touched?: My green pen, which I use to underline important passages in photocopies.
7. Thing you ate?: My Wowie cake with Buttercream frosting. So delicious!
8. Thing you drank?: A glass of Santa Ema cab with lunch. (though I admit it didn't go so well with the stir fry. And now I know.)
9.Thing you said?: "Idiots," muttered under my breath when I got off the phone with formentioned student loan peeps.
10. Friend you miss the most that has moved?: All of them!

Dear readers!

Hello dear readers!

I know few people read this anymore (sad!) but I just keep on going.

Today was an interesting day. I felt alert and prepared until I got to class to teach, when I just felt prepared. I have no idea where the alertness went. But it's OK, because class went well.

I'm a little annoyed with Canal 13. They are showing the Under 23 Chile Peru game rather than my teleserie! Not cool!

Music makes me happy

Today was a gray day, but for me a happy day. Why, one might ask? It is really quite simple. I got to play organ! It was great. Really fantastic.

Well let me modify that. My playing wasn't as fantastic as I might have liked - my keyboard skills are still up to snuff (duh!) but my feet... well let's just say my legs are having a harder time remembering what an octave interval is than my fingers have with anything on the organ. I started out working on some pieces I used to be able to play almost in my sleep from the Orgelbuchlein, and they actually caused me a bit of trouble. I just need to focus on the pedalwork and getting the parts back together. I also worked on a Bach Fugue, which went a little better, and I actually was pretty good for the modern piece I gave at a recital over a year ago. The only frustrating thing about that piece is that I didn't have all of the memories to make the register changes. But I was doing the swell pedal without even thinking about it! My hymns are also a bit off - but I find that every time I return to a hymn I haven't played in awhile, I remember how it is supposed to sound - or how I like to sing it - and my coordination between keyboard and pedal doesn't always keep up. But that is just practice. Which is what I can now do! Yippee!!

My mom always says that music is cheaper than therapy. While I definitely subscribe to this, I had forgotten how much I love playing. I have a keyboard in my house and all, but it's not the same as an actual piano (as soon as I have space and money, well you can guess...) Besides which, I don't have the pedal connectors and a few octaves are missing. And the touch is weird. But anyways, while I was playing today I could forget about all of the little things that were bothering me or stressing me and focus on my music. I wanted to skip around after I left the church. Unfortunately my happiness and de-stressing from playing didn't last forever (some people are jerks and don't know how to wait in line...), but now even just thinking of it makes me smile. I have made myself a practice schedule and a list of the pieces I would like to concentrate on - I am so happy! Yay for music!

All kinds of awesome!

So do you, dear reader, want to know what is all kinds of awesome? Of course you do! And tonight's answer is Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Yes, it is that fabulous. I pretended to read Facundo while I watched it. Let me tell you, Indy's growing positive relationship with his father is a gazillion times more interesting. Besides which, watching him punch the Nazis is always fun.

Also fabulous? Church is fabulous. Seriously, it is.

And now that I have made myself sound like a... well... pick your stereotype, I really am going to read Facundo. Really.

I saw a new movie today!

I think I am going to make a rule that I am not allowed to look at the news more than X number of times a day. Because it is getting ridiculous.

I saw El Aura today. It is the last film Fabian Bielinsky made, and I'll admit I like Nueve Reinas much better. El Aura was just, well, somewhat predictable and very (unnecessarily) slow. However, in the long periods when nothing was happening, it was fun to make jokes about. So in that aspect it is positive. But in general, how can I put this? It's a film that buffs will like. In technical terms, it was quite well done, I liked the camera work and the music quite a bit. I suppose it was the plot, more than any other aspect of the movie, that made me feel a bit let down. And no matter how good the camera work is, I do like most of my movies to have a good plot - and it is not a good plot if, having never seen the film and not remembering the trailer, I can predict with accuracy what is going to happen. So, if you want an intersting film to see with people with a sense of humor, watch it, but if you are only going to watch one Bielinsky film, go with Nueve Reinas.

De La Maza

Yes, yes, this is my third post in a single day. But I have lots to say.

Has anyone in the US ever heard of Francisco De La Maza? Probably not. He's the mayor of one of the comunas of Santiago, Las Condes. While Joaquin Lavin, previously my most disliked Chilean politician, appears to have mellowed a bit, De La Maza just makes me angry. (Incidentally, Lavin was mayor of Las Condes, too.) The first thing De La Maza wanted to do was to close off the streets in one neighborhood during the night, supposedly to fight prostitution. Problem? That it is entirely illegal to block roads and sidewalks. His proposal is in the courts right now. But to look at that issue seriously, what would closing off one area do? It would annoy a lot of people who have legitimate business in the area (the neighborhood has a lot of hotels, restaurants, stores), for one. It would also just push the prostitutes to adjacent areas, which in no way actually solves the problem.

I thought that idea was silly, but for me at least, it gets better. The FDA finally approved Plan B for over the counter sale in the US. Oddly enough, Chile is having a Plan B controversy. I think most of the opposition stems from the false belief that Plan B causes abortion (and if you want citations on that, let me know and I'll get them to you.) The government has mandated that public health clinics must distribute Plan B to women over the age of 14 who ask for it, and that those between the ages of 14 and 18 do not need parental consent. Part of the purpose of this push is to allow poorer women access to the same reproductive health options as wealthy women. I think it is a good idea to make the medication available, especially considering the high numbers of (young!) teenage pregnancy. A lot of politicians (UDI, RN, and the Christian Democrats) are against Plan B because they don't really understand it. They aren't against condoms (finally)... Ugh. So, what is De La Maza's take on all of this? He is quoted in the paper as calling Plan B (in Chile, Postinor-2) abortive and saying that even though the law says that it must be made available to those who ask for it, *he* will only give it to minors who come with their parents. Is he a pharmacist? NO. Is this really any of his business? NO. What is interesting about the controversy, however, is how those who are against reproductive choice are couching their position in terms of personal privacy. "The State shouldn't get involved in this!" The State isn't mandating any particular behavior that would lead to having to use Plan B. It is trying to have more equality in health care! Ugh.

Space-cadet update

I admit that my last post was a bit - um... well... I do admit that I still think humanity is inherently good. And people are going to suck, no matter what. As my friend said (and this is a major paraphrase), the world doesn't need more cynics.

That said, my allergy medicine is sort of working. Except my eyes are dry, I'm still stuffy (though not as bad), and I have a killer headache. I'm hoping these pass, too. However, I feel like a serious space-cadet. No matter how hard I try I find it difficult to concentrate on anything. Uf.

But yeah, people are mostly good. Right?

Humanity is really just a big disappointment

Perhaps my title is a bit of an exaggeration - but there are definitely examples that confirm my great disappointment in humanity's apparent lack of an inherently good nature. Maybe we really are all horrible people pretending not to be.

In other words, I am having a horrible, miserable day.

In fact, there are many things that have gone wrong today, from people blaming me for things I had nothing to do with, being almost unable to breathe due to allergies (STILL), trying to get medicine to make it so I can breathe only to be told that THEY DONT HAVE IT (and be attended by the spaciest, most uncapable person ever) except for at three times the price. Please, forget that we had a meeting. And even better, be a horrible horrible person who, when no one else is polite enough to get up and give you their seat, be horrible to the sick person with grocery bags. Yes, without saying a word, pick up her bag and drop it on her foot. And to make things even better, when you are getting off (a whole 1 minute ride later), tap her shoulder to tell her she should "be more considerate of the people around her." Yes, because she can't breathe from allergies and her foot hurts from where you dropped her groceries on her, she must be a horrible person. UGH. If I had said anything nearly as rude to her, everyone would say "you are being mean to the pregnant woman!" [Yes this woman was pregnant. So - why did no one else give her a seat? Why does all of the burden fall on me? Because people suck.] But she can say whatever she likes to whomever she likes, basically be a bad person and fall back on the "I'm weak! Waa!" excuse for her bad behavior. I'll admit it, I'm angry.

I know I shouldn't let these things bother me. Taken alone they would be annoying but not make me furious material. I can't honestly remember a time when I have been so angry in the past few years. Sad, yes, but so I-want-to-throw-something-scream-pull-my-hair-our angry, well, no.

All of this, before noon.

Let's see how much worse today can get.

Allergies descend

*cough* *cough* I am having yet another bout of allergies, which does not make me a happy person. In order to breathe, I need to take medicines that make me feel like my brain is fuzzy. I don't like feeling like my brain is fuzzy. I do, however, appreciate Dimetapp. There is no reason that adults should have to take nasty cough syrup when Dimetapp proves that it doesn't have to make you gag.

My teleserie is most definitely ending in the next few days. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it, because it is very different from most of the other teleseries I have followed. Make that all of them. While it is interesting to see how the writers are resolving all of the different conflicts, part of me wishes that Descarado had been more popular, because it really raises some interesting issues. Medical ethics, business management issues, the normal love-jealousy-betrayal, etc. In the last few weeks, there has been a serious questioning by the "originals" as to why they even agreed to hand their lives over to the secret organization in the first place - which then leads to interesting and diverse reflections as to desire and fulfillment. I'll reserve my final judgment on the teleseries' "message" on that until I see what happens with the original Amanda (whose agent fell in love with the man she was supposed to marry, and tried to have Amanda killed so agent could in fact marry man, though other agent saves her and falls in love, becoming more human in the process). Will they make her go back to "her" life? If that is the case, when Amanda has decided that she no longer loves the man and doesn't want anything to do with it, what truly is the most ethical path? We shall see.

The purpose of libraries

Yesterday I was reminded why I never studied in the library as an undergraduate. I had to read a book that was on reserve in the undergrad library here, and man, it was difficult to concentrate. Evidentally people don't really study there, rather they speak so loudly to eachother that you can't help but here about their lives - how they will wait until the last minute to do their bio homework, students of the language I teach (though thankfully not mine) complaining about the program in general and how much they hate foreign language, break-ups, fraternity fantasy football leagues... in a library? Ugh. It was miserable.

While I know some of my friends thought of the library as a social hub, I imagined it as people sitting at the same table with their laptops IMing the person across from them. Libraries, in my mind, are for quiet study, book collection, and occasionally, computer work or coffee purchases. None of this noisy social hub that makes me want to pull my hair out. Perhaps this is more a symptom of my own study habits than anything else - I hate studying outside my house, where I control everything - food, music, temperature, etc. Either way, I plan to continue my avoidance of the other library. Because it smells funny, too.

On a different note, something hates my sinuses. Or is it that my sinuses hate something in the air here? It makes it hard to concentrate on anything when I feel lethargic and unable to breathe. Hopefully it will pass.

Happy Labor Day. Which I spent, technically, laboring. Woot.

More Poetry! Solzhenitsyn!

And here I have more poetry for you all... I rarely read the poetry or fiction in the New Yorker (is that a bad thing? I tend to stick to the articles, though S likes the fiction) but I actually read this one and liked it quite a bit. I remember looking through my parents books when I was smaller and besides seeing lots of books in a script I couldn't read (and still haven't learned... no Cyrillic for me...) I saw lots of books with Russian authors. I remember reading "One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich" and being shocked yet moved. So here is a poem he wrote, translated from the Russian by his son Ignat, that appeared in the New Yorker a few weeks ago.

Prisoner's Right
Yoke of years that we lived in prison
Grants no rights: we're entitled to naught.
Not to pulpits. Nor lecturns. Nor glory.
Nor power. Nor halos of saints.
Nor in memoirs to mix with fatigue and
Our colorless ashen complaints,
Nor that armies of youths should now run astride life
by the path that we treaded for them.
All will go as 'twill go. There's no point
To pound the wheel's rut in advance.
An illuminated interior suffering core:
May, for everything, this be our one recompense.
It's the loftiest gem of all earthly gemstones,
And, to carry it home undefiled,
Let, of our phantom rights, then, at the very least be
Our secreted right to an equal revenge.
There's a number. So endlessly long.
Comprehensible just to Chinese and to Russians.
All those fallen, extinguished, without guilt or trace.
In that number we're nil upon nil upon nil...
Our right is but one:
To be rancorless sons
of our luckless and sad Russian land.
Let our grievances burn, rot, decay deep inside.
To the outside we'll spring living shoots, only then,
Looking up, will our Russia's fatigued countryside
See the sun it awaited so long.
-- Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Help! Help! The hurricane is coming!

OK, so it's not really a hurricane. Basically it means that it is going to rain for the next week. Which is good, because rain is good. It makes the grass stay green. And helps get rid of the 90 degree heat that I so detest.

At least this year, when people from Europe call to ask us about our experience of "living the hurricane," we can at least said it rained. Because last year, the "hurricane" was warm and sunny. Good times.

Cartoon

Cartoon

First off everyone should look at that cartoon. It will take you all of 2 seconds.

I feel good now about school being back in session. Maybe it's because I had one of my seminars today and I am really excited about the class, the material should be challenging but interesting and I am really engaged by this professor. Good times. It also makes me quite excited for the rest of my seminars this week... which is always good.

I also feel like announcing to the world that I really really like navel oranges. I know, it is random, but they are so sweet, moist, and delicious. Perfect for when I am thirsty and want something sweet. And it's much better for me than eating ice cream or Alouette Garlic and Herbs cheese on sesame crackers. Though I love both of those, too. Other snacks of choice include pieces of bread (yes I know it's the Chilean in me) and honey wheat pretzels. Sometimes, mini-carrots. And now that I have revealed my random eating habits to the world... well, go look at that cartoon again and think about it. Yes, do that.

Poetry: The Two Trees

I know that there are some blogs that used to post weekly bits of poetry... and though those of you who know me know I'm a narrative sort of gal, there are some poems that I really enjoy. And since today I feel like sharing, I'll post my most favorite poem in the entire world in any language!

"THE TWO TREES"

BELOVED, gaze in thine own heart,
The holy tree is growing there;
From joy the holy branches start,
And all the trembling flowers they bear.
The changing colours of its fruit
Have dowered the stars with merry light;
The surety of its hidden root
Has planted quiet in the night;
The shaking of its leafy head
Has given the waves their melody,
And made my lips and music wed,
Murmuring a wizard song for thee.
There the Loves a circle go,
The flaming circle of our days,
Gyring, spiring to and fro
In those great ignorant leafy ways;
Remembering all that shaken hair
And how the wingèd sandals dart,
Thine eyes grow full of tender care:
Beloved, gaze in thine own heart.

Gaze no more in the bitter glass
The demons, with their subtle guile,
Lift up before us when they pass,
Or only gaze a little while;
For there a fatal image grows
That the stormy night receives,
Roots half hidden under snows,
Broken boughs and blackened leaves.
For all things turn to barrenness
In the dim glass the demons hold,
The glass of outer weariness,
Made when God slept in times of old.
There, through the broken branches, go
The ravens of unresting thought;
Flying, crying, to and fro,
Cruel claw and hungry throat,
Or else they stand and sniff the wind,
And shake their ragged wings; alas!
Thy tender eyes grow all unkind:
Gaze no more in the bitter glass.

--William Butler Yeats (1865-1939)

I remember way back in my senior year high school English class (uf that was relatively long ago, in the scale of my life...) we had an assignment to bring our favorite poem to class and read it out loud. I remember one classmate read all of "The Lady of Shalott," which is a nice poem, but man that was long. I read this one. Though I have read a lot of poetry since then, and there actually is quite a bit of poetry that I enjoy - though more to read on my own than as an object of study - this is still my favorite. I love the images, especially of movement - as well as the contrast between the two stanzas. Among other things, of course. So there you have it, my favorite poem.

Chau, Pluto

I don't understand all the emotional crap surrounding this whole Pluto business. It's science, not "oh no we all learned it this other way so it can't change." I always thought it was a bit odd to have Pluto out there, in the NASA My First Book of Space. You go from the detailed pictures of Saturn's rings to... well... there is a spec there. And I think there was an artist's rendition of the view of Pluto from Charon. But come on, people. There are only 8 planets! And lots of other categories, too. I think it's neat how they are categorizing things - imagine teaching kids about the exciting new changes, and I mean there is lots of pedagogical possibility in teaching about WHY Pluto was a planet and now it isn't.

The Colbert Report - La Palabra

OK. This is hilarious. And his Spanish isn't bad. Oh, Colbert Report and Daily Show make me almost wish I had cable... which is saying a lot. :-)

Movies that I like but that there are parts that I don't want to watch. (A cumbersome title)

I am quite pleased with the new way that I set up my living room. The computer is at an angle now so that the screen faces out into the room, so I can put on a movie and watch it from a relatively comfortable chair, as opposed to the computer chair. Which is excellent.

Speaking of watching movies on my computer, in the last few days I watched all three Lord of the Rings films. My favorite part is definitely when Rohan shows up in the Gondor battle and just crushes the orcs. That is just really cool. But it also made me realize that there are a lot of unpleasant moments in the film that I don't like to watch. When Bilbo asks Frodo when they are in Rivendell to see the ring again and freaks out. When the Uruk-hai are "born." When Gollum turns bad again after Faramir's men capture him. When Frodo sends Sam away. Uf. Shelob (the giant spider). Yuck.

But I didn't cry during the going away farewell part at the harbor at the end of Return of the King. I think I'm improving a bit there.

Oh, and class starts tomorrow.

Goodbye, setting my own daily schedule.

Classes start here on Wednesday. I am excited, but I feel like I want more summer. Not the hot weather, mind you. Really, I just want more of the time that I get to structure myself, however I like it. On the scale of schedules, an academic one isn't too bad - I get to choose my classes, I do in fact have wide swathes of time available, but it isn't the same as having weeks with few committments that I can dedicate to - what else? - reading for school. That's the funny thing that I wish non-academics had a better grasp of. The academy never really gets a vacation - and according to a bunch of articles, lots of other industries are taking our lead. Trip somewhere? Better bring grading, or some reading. I can't think of the last day where I did absolutely nothing related to work/school (since in some ways they are the same thing.) (and even though I know I wrote here about not doing anything, that isn't really true. For me, not doing anything really means that I didn't do as much as I wanted to.) I am perfectly happy always doing a little bit of work - because I love it. I really do love what I study. And though I am excited for my classes this semester and relieved to be teaching the same course as last year (no new prep!), I will miss my flexibility. So, goodbye summer reading (as I am closing in on the last chapters of the last book that was on my list) and hello, semester work.